LDRider: DEERSTRIKE: Tingling Brass Casings

This is your first, last and only warning: Following story describes my 60mph
deerstrike in great detail. Graphically, too, so delete now if you are 
sensitive
to language, squeamish about gore, or are a tree-hugging, card-carrying member
of the SPCA (while I'd like to say no animals were harmed in the production
of this story, that wasn't quite the case).

Executive Summary:
=================

Place:  East-central Oregon, HWY 395, south of John Day, north of Burns, Oregon

Time:	5:04 AM PDT, Thursday, May 24, 2001
Conditions:  55 degrees F, clear, bright daylight, completely dry, outstanding
road surface
Speed at impact: 61mph
Damage:	Massive bodywork damage, upper and lower fairings smashed, fairing 
pockets
cracked, inner
front fairing gone, front fender destroyed, radiator severely dented (but 
serviceable),
both FIAMM horns destroyed, right wingtip cover missing, left wingtip cover
cracked, windshield valance crushed.

Final Score:	Warchild = 1
		Bambi = 0
		Night Train = -1


The Story:
=========

	See why I HATE these fucking deer so much?

	So there I was, riding to Gerlach and the infamous MASS GOLD
endurance event.  I had departed well after midnight, cruising down HWY
395, one of THE FINEST motorcycle roads to be found anywhere.  I was
just coming down a hill to an incredibly flat valley that stretched
perhaps 1-2 miles before the next series of hills. This valley was
flat, Flat, FLAT, with nothing but sagebrush that was only 12-18" high.
I looked long and hard for any range cattle or other furry critters
that could cause problems. Nope, not a thing on this prairie but
sagebrush. I relaxed and descended into the valley floor.

	I was approximately halfway across the valley when I went into
another instrument scan. I checked the tachometer, looked up at the
Sigma, then down to the temp gauge, then looked up to see the 75-lb doe
looking right at me, standing directly in front of the bike, about 50
feet from impact.

The Sigma revealed I was traveling at 61 mph, which means I had about a
half a second to do something. However, there was nothing to be done. I
knew I was going to strike the deer, and even the deer looked like she
knew she was about to die. As my brain realized that an accident was
imminent, the classic perception of "time slowing down" kicked in,
allowing all the following to happen prior to impact:

The first thing I did was silently scream at the deer, "Now, just where
in the FUCK did you come from?!" This was just too unbelievable....
it's not like this deer emerged from a forest, and it's not like it had
any place to hide!! [Note:  surveying the crash scene afterward, I saw
a somewhat more sizeable sage brush that the doe was (obviously)
sleeping/hiding behind; it was about 24" high, immediately next to the
point of impact]

I began an attempt to swerve behind the doe, started to push the right
grip downward when (again, given that perception of "slow time") I
realized it wasn't going to do any good, and I had better not be
leaning when we struck, so I stood the bike up so I would have a
"clean" impact. By now I was about 10 feet from the doe, and looked
right into her eyes. Two thoughts flashed "Man, is my bride ever going
to be pissed at me if I die like this...." and a second thought:
"well, it's lookin' like there will be one less rider at MASS
GOLD...".

I tore into her body at 61 mph.

continued....


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