Re: [ST] Why NOT synthetic ... the last word

[Mike Montville <mjmontville@xxxxxxxxx>]

Thanks, Garry -- wear metal levels were my other concern.  My cold weather
riding is above 40 F. for me!  Finally, here's a severe caution I received
from RAT pack leader Coop (I hope it's not a re-post, as I only recently
joined the list).
______________________________________

Subject: Synthetic Oil Warning!

Beware of synthetic oil! It can do terrible things to you and your beloved
motorcycle. It will not only leak out of your engine faster than you can
put it in, but it will also cause your oil filter to clog and implode,
dumping debris and dirt into your lubrication system. It also will make
every part of your bike permanently slippery because of its linear
molecular chain dispersion action. Then it will leak onto your kickstand
causing it to retract automatically, dropping your bike on the ground! But
that's not all...

Synthetic oil will round off your gears and spin your bearings. It will
also splatter onto your seat causing your girlfriend to fall off in the
apex of a turn and she'll never ride with you again. Synthetic oil coats
your sight window and your timing window with a whitish pro-emulsification
additive that is both non-removable and highly corrosive. Synthetic oil
will completely leak onto the ground overnight and your dog will drink it
and die.

Synthetic oil will wear out your tires and makes your battery leak. It
will give you the desperate need to urinate after you put your full
leathers on and then jam your zippers shut. It will contaminate your
gasoline causing your bike to stall on railroad tracks and accelerate
uncontrollably near police cars. It will make it rain during rallies and
on weekends. It will lubricate your timing belts causing them to jump
teeth and break your valves to bits. Synthetic oil chemically weakens
desmodromic valves and causes the clearances to change every six miles.
Then it melts the black soles of your riding boots night before you walk
across your new carpeting.

While riding past groups of attractive women it will cause both of your
handlebar grips to slip off at the same time so you smash your windscreen
with the bridge of your nose. It also causes your swingarm to crack, your
studs to break, and your rotors to warp, and then it voids your warranty
by changing your odometer reading to 55,555. It also dries out your
wetclutch and wets your dryclutch. It makes your clutch slave cylinder
seal fail in the heaviest traffic on the hottest day of the year while
putting an angry wasp in your helmet for good measure.

Synthetic oil hides your 13mm socket and puts superglue on your earplugs.
Synthetic oil will scratch your faceshield and make your gloves shrink two
sizes the night before trackday. Synthetic oil stole your neutral and sold
it to the Chinese for £1.25. Synthetic oil will make you grow a tail.
Synthetic oil will write long crazy e-mails to your Internet friends and
then sign your name at the bottom!
________________________________________________________


- --- "Bird, Garry" <BIRD@xxxxxxx> wrote:
> Mike:  The analysis didn't reveal anything other than the viscosity
> change.  Nice thing, though...wear metal levels were okay as in nothing
> to be concerned with.  As for using 20w50 in the colder months, I don't
> typically ride much or often if the temp is lower than about 50 deg F. 
> The low temp range of 20w50 is about 32 deg F so as long as you are
> starting the bike above that temperature, you could stay with the heavy
> oil, technically speaking.  Depending on the kind of driving you do in
> the cold and depending on what you call cold might dictate the oil grade
> you should use.  Short trips, low speeds, oil not really heating up,
> temps lower than 40 degrees I would go with 10w40.  If you are on the
> highway (10-15 miles or more) and temps above 40 degrees then I would
> stay with the 20w50.
> 
> Lastly, FYI, I traded my Sprint in last May for a different bike.  A big
> one with 6 cylinders and 1800 cc's.  I am currently running 10w40 in
> that big boat per manufacturer's specs but when I drain the oil this
> fall I will have it analyzed to see how it's behaving.  Based on the
> results, I may change up to 20w50, again.
> 
> 
> >Date: Wed, 3 Sep 2003 12:28:35 -0700 (PDT)
> >From: Mike Montville <mjmontville@xxxxxxxxx>
> >Subject: Re: [ST] Why Synthetic Oil?
> 
> >Garry,
> 
> >Thanks for sharing the analysis results!
> 
> >I switched to 20w50 Amsoil at the last change, almost 3K mi. ago.  Just
> >about to drain & refill, but I was having second thoughts about using
> >their 10w40 this time.  Your results seem to indicate staying with the
> >20w50, to preserve the minimum upper viscosity near oil change time.
> 
> >Did the analysis reveal anything further?  Will you stay with the
> heavier
> >oil during the colder months?
> 
> >Mike
> 
> __________________
> Garry Bird
> 
> 
> 
> 
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