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Re: More Silliness [was RE: [ST] How the academic world sees bikers...]



I'm out.  Lawler is just too good.  First the fractured fairy tale, now 
this.  I can't compete!

Denis Liakos
- ----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Steve Lawler" <slawler@xxxxxxxxxxx>
To: <ST@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Sent: Saturday, February 12, 2005 2:39 PM
Subject: Re: More Silliness [was RE: [ST] How the academic world sees 
bikers...]


> And another...
>
> One night at around 2am, after a particularly grueling day at work I was
> riding home. I was half way through a right hander in a residential area
> when suddenly something shot out in front of me.
>
> Whump. Whump. The front bounced and while in the midst of recovering the
> rear slid out. Somehow I managed to get out of the mess and came to a
> stop. "What was THAT?"
>
> I dismounted, walked back and found a pile of an ex-tabby cat with a
> bell on a pink ribbon around its neck. I figured I would kick it out of
> the way so that no one else would slip on it. Out of the corner of my
> eye, I caught head lights approaching. It was the local gendarme. "Son,
> what are you doing?"
>
> I like the way that the helmet hides my pate better than my hair ever
> did thus making it pleasant to be called "Son" by guys younger than me.
>
> "Pushing this cat out of the way."
>
> "Did you kill it?"
>
> "It ran out in front me. I couldn't avoid it."
>
> The cop stared me up and down. I believed he was trying to figure if I
> was drunk or not. I rolled my eyes. He told me that I would have to find
> the owner. I said that I would gladly come back in the morning. He said
> "Now!" After arguing and being threatened with a night in jail I began
> my quest.
>
> I went to the nearest house. The door was answered by some scruffy, 280
> pound, wife-beater wearing, drunk who threatened me with bodily harm if
> I didn't get off his porch. I went and told the cop that if I was going
> to do this at this hour then he would have to come up to the houses with
> me. The cop agreed reluctantly. Moron, this was his idea.
>
> The next door was answered by this sweet old lady in her night gown.
>
> "Excuse me ma'am," I started. "Do you own a tabby cat?"
>
> "Yes, I do."
>
> "With a bell on a pink ribbon?"
>
> "Yes. Oh dear. What happened to Angel?"
>
> I explained the events that led to the demise of Angel. I didn't have
> the heart to tell her that it was killed by the "Blue Devil." She was
> crying and muttering something about having just gotten all of its shots
> and it costing $100. I offered to pay her. At first she refused, but I
> insisted. I took out my wallet, handed her the $100 and watched in total
> disbelief the cop arrested her.
>
> For selling her pussy.
>
> -- 
> Steve Lawler
> Verona, NJ, USA
>
> 2001 Sprint ST "Blue Devil"
>
> "Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a
> function."
>            -- Unknown
>
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> *
>      The ST/RS Mailing list is sponsored by Jack Lilley Ltd.
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>
> 



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